and

Friday blended in

to Saturday morning.

Elmers glue mixed with water, 

an old NY Post, a 4x4 piece of plywood, 

gin, vermouth 

olive brine

I couldn't sleep and kept standing 

pacing

creating

information overload

I think

too much

too much?

too little?

too late?

It's relative.
Literally

I'm struggling now to accept and understand the damage I've endured
how to accept that I am a survivor
whether I want to be or not

trying to rewrite the endings of my actions
go back to the beginning
one year at a time.

reading
writing
yelling
crumbling
standing

again

and it is information overload